My Blog

I have been complaining too much lately that i forgot of what i have. The more i complaint, the less i gain, and the more i lose. 

I suddenly realised my mistake and i beg Allah for His forgiveness and ever since  i reminded myself to always feel content of what i have, i can feel His love and barakah  for me grew.

I have been blessed with healthy body and brain, family who cares, kind and loyal boyfriend. I might not be the best in the world but i know i am better than many others. Alhamdulillah. Allah has given so much to me in everything but i still forgot to count my blessings.

I’m feeling so weak, not in my body or my mind, but my soul.
Being alone in overseas plus being in final medical year, i need to…

be strong in terms of my ibadah,
be strong emotionally
be strong physically
 
there is no one here to remind me, i need to remind myself (and ask for reminders)

Here among the quotes from Muhammad Ali (a legendary boxer) that i love:

-A man who views the world the same at 50as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life.

-Age is whatever you think it is. You are as old as you think you are.

-It isn’t the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it’s the pebble in your shoe.

-It’s the repetition of affirmations that leads to
belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to
happen.

-God gave me this illness (Parkinson Disease) to remind me that I’m not number One; He is.

Yesterday morning, I walked into  one of the rooms in geriatric ward without realising a notice on the door;

" WInter vomiting bugs. Closed for visitors. Please wash your hands before you come in"

I headed straight to my patient’s bed without wearing the glove and apron . She was holding a handkerchief close to her mouth and look nauseated. I didn’t want to disturb her so i went to another patient. He is an elderly man sitting on a chair reading a newspaper. I approached him and he flashed me with his colgate smile.

"Excuse me sir, do you mind if i have a chit chat with you for a while?" I said.
"oh, sure2, please, have a seat" he answered.

So, as usual i began my history taking process asking about his age.

"So, do you mind to tell me how old are you?" I asked.
"Oh, i was born in 1979"

I jot down down the year on my blank paper and started calculating. Wait. 28 years old? This can’t be.He looks definitely more than 70.  I calculated again like a fool. Huhu.  Something is wrong with my left brain. I can’t do a simple math.

So,i  ignore the calculating part and proceed with my next question.

"Hmm, when did you come to this hospital?" I asked again.
"Oh i came here last year…." He said.
"when exactly is that?"
"Oh, it was in 1959…My dad and my mom brought me in because i have a fever.."

ok. now i know my left brain is working fine.

p/s: I went back home and had rigors and tummy pain. Maybe, the norovirus (winter vomiting bug) has got into me. Waiting for the vomiting phase. but nothing happened today. My immune system is fighting the virus hard…

Ok, this is my third lame attempt to blog.

Today, I received a message from a friend wondering about the vanishing previous entries. Well, at least someone out there knew the existence of my blog. Arigato!

Nothing much happened lately. I just completed my final year research project on “Awareness and Use of Folic Acid among Malaysian Women of Childbearing Age”. I’ve sent a copy to my co-supervisor in Malaysia, Prof Hans Van Rostenberge and another copy to Lancetstudent.com. I haven’t got any news from them yet. Maybe my project is not good enough for publishing. Well, takpe. Always aim for the moon, even if you miss it, you might catch a star, right? Melayu Boleh! Islam boleh!

Pagi tadi, tgh syok2 tido, tetiba otakku berseru “Amy……bangun tido!! Tak takut kantoi ngan Prof Buckey datang lambat lagi kee???” I woke up and looked at my clock lying on the floor. Alamak!!! Dah pukul 9.30 pagi !!!!!!!!!!! Uwaaa.!!!! Gelabahnya!!! Tuhla, pdan muka. Sapa suruh tgk anime Hajime no Ippo sampai kol 3 pagi semalam. Di mata ku terbayang wajah Prof Buckley and Chiaki menunggu manalaaa final med student yg rajinnn tuuu…… huhu… Tgh panick2 tu, tetibe terpandang my mobile clock and it was only 8 in the morning. Actually my alarm clock got knocked off onto the floor and battery tercabut. Hehe. Naseb baik. Kalo tak, abeslahh impression marks kuuu….

As usual, it was a very busy day. Prof Buckey asked us (me and Mezy) to do the new admissions.   As I walked along the hospital corridor, suddenly a patient approached me from behind. I remember him because last week, Chiaki asked us to demonstrate neurological examination on him in front of her as part of the practice for final exam.

He said to me “You are very efficient!!! (in Limerick accent). All the best in your final exams!” Wow. This is very flattering. Thank you pakcik. You really made my day! d(^_^)b ~Happy Happy~ [ngeh ngeh kumbang kuncup]

It is really motivating to have someone appreciate your hard works. Hidup sebagai medical student ni takde life. Especially kat oversea and Cork yang BOSAN ni.
Balik rumah setiap hari dahle takde org masak, nak beli kat luar pon takde yang halal kalo ade halal pon tak mampu. So, terpaksa masak sendiri  dengan apa yang ada. Nak keluar enjoy, kat luar tuh sejuk, kalo tak sjeuk pon ade tempat yg best ke? Irish pub? Hohhh, biarla kena paksa seribu taun ngan Maeve pon aku maleh nak pergi pub ke bar ke apa. Tak sukela tempat crowded ramai org ni. Nak borak2 ngan org pon takde, mak ayah jauh, kalo call diorang pon, tgk drama TV3 lagi best dari borak dengan anak sendiri…. Uwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa sedihnyaa kehidupankuuu…

I think my life now is all centred about being a medical student. As a proof, this is a conversation between me and firdaus the other day:

- F: “Awak tau tak Megat Junid dah meninggal dunia?”

- Me: “Tak..”

- F: “Awak tau tak skrang tgh economy crisis?”

- Me:  “Oh, tak tau pon. Yeke …?”

- F: “Awak tau tak Mahathir dah meninggal dunia??”

- Me: “Hoooohh? Serious keeee?????? Betoll keee??”

- F: “Haha, apelaa.. tipu jela,…”
-
Me: “Hoh, terokknyee…… tak kelakar pon..”

- F: “Awak tau tak Siti Nurhaliza dah pakai tudung..?”

- Me: “Oh, TAU!!!!!”

Ok, at least I know about the latest hot issue in Malaysia. My general knowledge is not that bad…